Give yourself the love that you truly deserve
Self-Care has earned itself a new meaning. In the past, when hearing the words “self-care” and “self-love”, we might have only thought about a night full of face masks, movies and wine.
Now, as much as this sounds like a fantastic night to me – a self-care routine that would better suit you and your needs could look completely different.
You might enjoy going on a shopping spree, eating your favourite foods, or cleaning your house.
Only you know truly what would make you feel happy. Learning your self-love language and implementing it into your self-care routine is the key to feeling fulfilled.
Dr. Gaary Chapman released a great theory that stated that everyone gives and receives love in different ways. He states that there are 5 categories when it comes to our love languages.
Words of affirmations, Acts of Service, Quality Time, Gifts, and Physical Touch.
Knowing this, you can use this information to better express and experience love.
He uses this theory to better understand how to love and be loved by your partner.
In this post however, I want to look at how it can transform the very love that’s more important than any other. The love that you share within yourself.
Find which one below best describes what you value the most, and explore through the different ways you can treat yourself.
Words of Affirmations
How you speak to yourself is one of the most important factors when it comes to your self-love. You spend the most time talking to yourself – in your mind. The communication you have between your inner self and your conscious self is so critical and should be nurtured.
If you value compliments and lovely words spoken to you, it’s important to share that love with yourself.
Here are some ways you can use words of affirmations to show your love :
- Write out 3-5 affirmations for the week. Repeat these in the morning and right before bed.
- Insert gratitude into your daily routine. Make sure you take a moment to really thank yourself and your life for what you currently have.
- Listen to an inspirational podcast that really empowers you.
- Grab your journal and get writing! Write out your goals for the next year. Take the time to really listen to your wants.
Acts of service
Acts of service for individuals who value actions over words. These are usually the people who really enjoy when others show up for them. Usually, we relate it to showing up with coffee for a friend – or cooking your spouse’s favourite meal after a long day. But, what does it mean for self-love?
This could mean doing something for yourself to show yourself kindness.
Here are some ways you can show yourself love through acts of service :
- Decluttering your space and tidying up! Your inner peace will thank you when you feel less cluttered.
- Cook your favourite meal. Good – bad – whatever. Cook whatever makes you happy and makes you feel great!
- Doing something sweet for your pet like taking the dog out for a walk/changing the fish tank water/cleaning the kitty litter
When you value quality time with a loved one – it means that you value mindful time. Undivided attention, connecting on a deeper level and really just being present is essential for you.
Being alone and really being with yourself can go an extremely long way. It’s all about reminding yourself how special, and valued you are.
Here are some ways you can show yourself love through Quality Time :
- Read a book that you enjoy for 45 minutes every day
- Update your music playlist and find some new songs that you’ve never heard before
- Write in your journal and really take the time to mind dump
- Watch a movie that you’ve been dying to see. This could be rewatching too!
- Going for a nice nature walk along your favourite trails.
Let me know down below if this sounds like you, but I absolutely love that burst of happiness you get whenever an amazon present comes in the mail – or you finally get that one item that you’ve had your sights set on for months!
Sometimes, we may shy away from this way of showing ourselves love because it has been deemed as “not spending our money correctly” but in reality – if this is the way you like to receive love – you should most definitely come up with a smart plan to make sure you can give yourself love every month!
The most important thing is that these treats are meaningful to you.
Here are some ways you can show yourself love through gifts :
- Purchase something that smells nice ( a candle for your room, perfume, or a body wash)
- Buy that one thing that you’ve had in your amazon gift card for forever – This is your sign!
- Buy your friend/family member that christmas present that you’ve been thinking about. Never hurts to get a jump start!
- Decorate your workspace. Make it somewhere you really enjoy being!
- Turn your room into a cozy haven. This is your safe place – you want it to reflect that.
If your love language is Physical Touch – this means you crave the intimacy and closeness from others. Oftentimes we find that through being held, kisses, holding hands etc. So, how can we find this type of love within ourselves?
Here are some ways you can show yourself love through physical touch :
- Take a nice bath/shower.
- Deep condition your hair, maybe with a hair masque
- Do some yoga/meditation practice
- Wear your favourite clothes – like a comfy sweater.
- Hold a loved one, your friends, or your pets.
At the end of the day, the love that you give yourself is more important than anything else. You are your truest best friend, advocate, best listener and only YOU know how to give yourself the love that you truly deserve.
What’s your favourite way to show yourself love?